Recently in Tips Category

Happy National Speak Up and Succeed Day!  (Thanks, Diane DiResta, for reminding me!)

As I do the work I do each day - giving seminars to women's groups or connecting with new colleagues to partner with, working with my support team or communicating with my clients - I've begun to notice something quite interesting about how people work.

There are two fundamental ways in which people attempt to expand themselves in the world.

These two ways are:

Collaborating with others in a respectful and empowering way, to help each other be all you both wish to be

Or

Attempting to crush out the competition through snarky, denigrating, and low-spirited tactics

Which approach are you engaged in?

The first approach encourages you to:

• Feel good in your interactions
• Expand your skills and know-how
• Experience yourself as purposeful and beneficial in your interchanges
• Learn more about how to do what you love to do and how you are special
• Discover new skills and endeavors you're capable of
• Grow faster and more effectively through positive synergy

The second approach encourages you to:

• Feel lousy and critical about your interactions
• Constrict your thinking about what you're capable of
• Mistake yourself as someone who is higher and more important in the hierarchy
• Believe that there simply isn't enough to go around
• Remain stuck in the jealous, insecure "Am I good enough?" mode
• Move slower, with less success, ease, and fulfillment

In short, collaboration allows you to Say Yes! to yourself, to others and to expanding yourself to what you truly long to do.  Fearful competition keeps you stuck in the constricting, "NO" mode.

How can you tell cut-throat competition when you see it?

Here are some key hallmarks:

1) Language and action that indicates, "I'm smarter, better, richer, more successful than you."

2) Over-selling - making a point over and over again so that the receiver ends up saying "OK already!"

3) Deep insecurity about being challenged or receiving constructive feedback

4) A lack of receptivity, compassion, and openness to learning from and being with others

5) An energy of "take, take, take" without giving back

6) A haughty or superior energy/attitude that says, "I'm father along the path than you, and you'll have to learn the hard way, like I did."

Be mindful about whom you choose to associate with in the world and how you go about getting what you want.  The "how" of your approach is more impactful than specific tactics you use.  Overall, if your colleagues, partners, and friends are individuals who make you and others feel great about themselves in an authentic and enlivening way, then they're on the right track, and so are you.

On the other hand, if you, your associates or friends are stuck in the diminishing, competitive "there's not enough to go around, and I'm getting my piece!" mode, it's time for a breakthrough to a collaborative spirit.  Without it, the path you're headed down will most certainly take you where you don't want to go.

Happy New Year, Friends!  Hope your holidays were beautiful.

As we're on to a new year and decade, there have been skillions of articles and blogs published about how to create what you want in this new chapter of our lives.

I like to be a contrarian, and offer up ideas in opposition to the norm, to get us thinking.  Towards that end, here's one:

Let's NOT create New Year's Resolutions this year.

I'm not a fan of resolutions.  It seems that "resolutions" are somehow associated with failure...the things we say we are going to do, but in the end, don't achieve, because we lack the commitment, energy, drive, or wherewithal to complete them.
 
Let's not make resolutions this year.  Let's do something different.  Let's designate "areas of intensive focus" and watch what emerges as the year unfolds. 

Here's my plan:

I've written down four outcomes that are very important to me - areas or experiences that I have now but want more of in my life -- that I intend to focus on going forward. 

To me, focus is everything. If we can determine in some detail what we want to create, understand and validate why we want to create it, then look intently for new opportunities and possibilities around that particular goal or outcome, success happens (or at least we progress towards it in a much easier, fun, and fulfilling way than would otherwise occur). 

Wonderful occurrences and synchronicities that we simply couldn't expect or predict fall into our experience, as we focus intently on our desired outcomes.  New doors open, new friends and supporters make themselves known, new lessons learned, new paths revealed.  If we don't focus intently on what we want to create, we miss so many chances for moving forward on the path we long for.

Here's what my "intensive focus" areas for 2010 look like:

Focus Area #1:
What Do I Want More Of?
Creating high-demand national seminars, products, and training programs that give women the tools they long for to transform their challenges into breakthrough to a new level of great success. 

Why Do I Want It?
Because these programs will help teach women how to manage and shape their lives successfully on their own terms, and be great fun and reward for me to share and participate in this learning and teaching process. 

Focus Area #2:
What Do I Want More Of?
Attracting coaching and consulting clients whom I LOVE to work with and who love to work with me.

Why Do I Want It?
Because coaching groups and one-on-one with folks who resonate with me energetically and in their thinking and behavior, is great joy to me, and allows me to interact in deeply personal ways to help people make the changes they long for.

Focus Area #3:
What Do I Want More Of?
Learning as much as I can (then sharing back that wisdom) about what contributes to abundant success - personal, professional, financial, and spiritual - in the lives of women across all generations.
 
Why Do I Want It?
I love to research human behavior and thinking, then develop my own personalized "model for change."  Researching abundant success represents the next level for me - it will teach me lessons I'm yearning to learn, and also help others who've had an initial transformative breakthrough, but now want more.

Focus Area #4:
What Do I Want More Of?
To treasure and appreciate and receive deeply -- in every cell of my body -- all the bountiful blessings in my life now and those blessings that are forthcoming.  My blessing list is long, and includes my precious children, husband, health, parents, family, friends, work, creative endeavors, and the list goes on.

Why Do I Want It?
I'm not so hot at receiving.  It's an area I definitely want to grow in.  When I am in the place of full-on receiving, it feels absolutely fantastic physically and emotionally, and the effects are long-lasting and delicious.  I'm ready for more receiving! (Thanks to my new financial consultant and colleague, Denise Hughes, for facilitating that powerful revelation).

That's it for me.  Out with the resolutions, and in with some intensive focus on what I love in my life, and what I'd love to create more bountifully this year. 
 
So how about you?  Will you do the above exercise for your 2010?  What would you like to focus on creating this year, and why? 

Let's skip the resolutions, and replace them with a validation of your heartfelt longings, and your clear-sighted focus on what you're passionate about, and what you want more of this year.

This is YOUR year.

My wonderful coaching clients ask me frequently, "How do I know if this is the right step?  I'm just so confused." 

To get clear on the next step to take that will be ultimately beneficial for you, answer these three questions first, then move on the path to making your decision.

There are three powerful questions to consider before you address any significant decision:

1) Do you have enough information to make this decision?  If not, get it.

2) Is it the right time to make this decision - if not, then wait.  If so, take the steps listed below.

3) How important is this decision?  If it's not at all important to your life, stop agonizing, and use your gut to tell you what direction to go in, and just do something.

If the time is right to make your decision, and you have enough information to do it, then follow this process:

1) Shift your mindset about decisions and next steps

First, disengage yourself from needing to believe that there is an ultimate "right" outcome to anything.  There isn't.  Life is a cycle, a process, a flow, not a final destination.  You'll never "get there."  It's all about experiencing life fully, NOW, and loving it.  Forget about outcome, and look at "process" - explore what you think this step will bring to you, along with the process of living that this step will allow you to engage in.  In other words, will this next step encourage you to grow, stretch, be excited, enlivened, and expand yourself?  If so, there's a great deal of benefit in it.

2) How does it make you feel to consider it?

In my marriage and family therapy training, one professor said that "feeling" is the "F" word - because a therapist and client talking just about feelings can be a slippery slope of not leading to any interventions that truly help a person move forward.

In this case, however, gaining awareness of how you feel is vitally important.  Watch yourself as you explore this next step or potential decision.  Do you feel energized, excited, with your heart beating?  Or do you feel like taking a nap, exhausted, depressed and hopeless.  How you feel, and the shifts in your energy level when you're evaluating a potential decision are highly indicative of what your heart and soul really want to do.

3) Look at what holds you back - is it all fear-based?

Write out all the pros and cons to the decision you're facing.  Then look at the cons...are they all fear-based ("what if", anxiety-ridden thinking)?  If so, you're most likely getting stuck in your limited beliefs and ego-based thinking that tell you that you simply can't embrace this challenge or step because you'll fail or the unknown is too scary.  The unknown doesn't have to be scary - if you embrace it as a way to be more of yourself.

4) What does your intuition/gut tell you to do?

Decisions are best made when you combine logical, linear thinking with intuitive-based wisdom that comes from a higher place.  Your logical thinking helps you identify all the pros and cons (see #3) from an intellectual perspective, but your intuition has a farther-reaching view, one that sees a bigger picture of who and where you truly want to go, and what you're capable of. 

Get in closer touch with your internal guiding wisdom and intuition.  Start today by developing a deeper inner dialog.  Ask questions of yourself on a continual basis, and listen for the answers, then follow them!.  Begin by asking simple "yes" or "no" questions (should I take this route or that one to get to my destination, should I stop here or wait a bit, etc.), and begin hearing what your intuition tells you.  Find the place in your body where your feel your intuition most (your gut, throat, back of your neck, heart, etc.) and begin incorporating the messages of your intuition in every decision you make.

*  *  *  *  *

Ultimately, each decision you make is the right one, because you made it, and you did your best at the time, and because it inevitably led to something that was important for you to experience.  Going forward, make your decisions with fuller awareness, choice, and a belief that everything you experience will ultimately lead to something greater in yourself.  Then, every decision will feel like (and be) the right one. 

If you have a decision to make today: get the info you need, don't make assumptions about what you're capable of, do your best, stop worrying, and start living.

Question of the week: What decisions have you made that at first seemed to be a mistake, but later opened up great new possibilities for you?

This week, two ongoing clients of mine simply forgot they were scheduled for a coaching session, and just didn't call.  When talking to them later, they apologized profusely, with sincere embarrassment, and told me they were crashingly busy, and their week got away from them  -- they simply forgot (or had neglected to write it down).

When stuff happens in my life -- in twos and threes like this -- I like to try to wrap my head around if there's something for me to learn or do differently, or if it's just a random occurrence not worthy of any major evaluation or analysis.  After all, sometimes in life (as a friend of mine likes to say), "A butterfly is just a butterfly."

In this case, I think there is something to look at...that perhaps making time for self-examination and self-discovery is a bit daunting in the face of everything else going on for these folks this week.    Perhaps an "I forgot" really means, "I can't take this in, this week. I'm just not up for it.  I will be ready again soon, but not this week."  And I really get that.

What would be even more beneficial would be if each of us grew in our awareness of this feeling, and said out loud, "I'm a bit overwhelmed right now, and can't tackle anything more this week."  After all, we've all had moments/periods like that.  There's no shame in it.

To answer my own question, then, do I take these types of occurrences personally (that a few folks are forgetting to call in on a given week?)  Actually, no, I don't (please let me know if you think I'm crazy!)  Per the powerful Four Agreements, by don Miguel Ruiz, I work on avoiding taking things personally, because it gives me greater freedom not to, and an increased ability to keep an open heart and mind.  After all, whatever you want and need is up to you, as is the way you choose to communicate it.  In the end, I'm happier and less self-conscious when I don't take things personally.

Question of the day: What do you take really personally, and what can you just let go of instead?  I'd love to hear your views.

Here's to letting it all go, and feeling freer to just be ourselves and letting others do the same.

As with any major shift occurring in the world, one person can't turn it around all by him/herself.  But each of us can have a direct and significant impact, and that impact reverberates and spreads.  Blog Action Day '09 asks us to take responsibility today, speak up, and spark a global discussion on climate change.  Join the discussion - add your voice!

Clearly, we are accountable for how we live our lives, for what we model for others and our children.  We are responsible for the core messages we send to our family, our community, and the world about what we value, support, and wish to protect and nurture. 

How each of us addresses this climate crisis is very similar to the ways in which we handle our own personal crises.

What's the best way to deal with any crisis?

1.                   Get out of denial - Admit we have a serious crisis on our hands, and take concrete action to address it.

2.                   Get accountable - Take responsibility for your own actions and do what you can. 

3.                   Treasure the good - Know what makes life worth living, and value and protect it.

4.                   Plan for the future  - Understand yourself and the far-reaching implications of your actions.  Think about the future and what you want to build and leave behind, not just of the present.

5.                   Commit to being the change you want to see - Step up, and realize that even one new promise or decisive action can create a shift and make all the difference.

In my family of four (with two school-aged children), we focus on doing what we can to contribute to slowing climate change.  We use less energy, and cut down on waste.  We turn off lights, appliances, and computers that aren't in use.  We've reduced our driving, and commit to carpooling wherever possible.  We recycle, use energy efficient appliances, support locally grown food, keep the temperature in our house a few degrees lower, properly insulate our home and heater, and take shorter showers and fewer baths. 

Another way we contribute to facilitating positive change is by supporting political candidates who care deeply about this issue, and who are 100% committed to enacting policies, laws, and endeavors that will reduce greenhouse gas emissions.  Most importantly, we discuss the issue openly with our children and explore what new things they and their generation can do to help.

I hope people will continue to find their own ways to create breakthrough in how they address this serious crisis.  In dealing with climate change, as in handling our personal crises, failing to understand that we've co-created the problem and need to shift our behavior, is simply playing the victim.  That type of thinking, as we've learned, will never get us where we need and want to go.

For me, participating in this action day has spurred me to step up my commitment (for one, I will stop using plastic bags for shopping, starting today).

What one step can you take today to step up your commitment?

Thank you for sharing your voice and participating.  Wishing our world many powerful breakthroughs.

In speaking today with my fabulous digital strategy mentor Nettie Hartsock, we stumbled on an interesting concept, which is this...in the digital world, it's all about open contributing and sharing generously, giving of yourself freely.  It's also about shining a light on others -- pointing to the special brilliance and contribution of other colleagues and leading edge thinkers in a way that sustains and nurtures community, connection, learning and the global growth.

The underlying problem with this whole approach for so many small business owners, creatives, authors, consultants and entrepreneurs, is that this idea - this "movement," shall we say -- can feel in total opposition to how we've operated for years.  Giving of ourselves freely (without asking for or commanding money for own gifts, talents, and services), and pointing to the distinguished talents of others, can feel in sharp contrast to the ways we've achieved success (financial, emotional, and otherwise) in the past.  After all, our cultural worldview has, up until now, been about the individual hacking it out in the wilderness, and coming up with the bounty all by him/herself.

Thousands of individuals today have achieved fantastic results and accomplishments because of their intense and relentless focus on self - what they offer the world individually and uniquely that no one else can.  So the idea of a shift from a self-orientation to a community-orientation can be daunting, scary and confusing.  Giving away for free what folks have spent years honing and developing - the very thing that makes them different and sets them apart -- seems counterintuitive, or bad business, to many. 

Further, the ego - the part of the personality equation that is so often helpful in launching yourself powerfully in the world - can feel very threatened when we're being asked to shift away from self-centric endeavors to community-building endeavors.

As a business owner who helps other business owners, practitioners, authors, professionals, etc. make money doing what they love, I know that balance is essential to a passionate, powerful, and purposeful life and career.  Balance in all areas is vitally important - balance between work and family, between making great money and doing good in the world, AND balance between gratifying and sustaining your ego/individuality/self and supporting the growth of the world outside yourself.

These are not mutually exclusive endeavors, of course, though they can feel like they are.  People say to me, "I don't have one second to waste in my business.  Times are so hard.  I don't have time to blog and tweet and follow others.  I need to go out and make some money here!"

But finding a way to contribute openheartedly to the world WHILE sustaining and nurturing the self in a bountiful way is the key to a well-lived life and a successful business/career.

So to those who ask themselves, "Do I really have to participate in this online movement to grow my business?" I say this - giving and sharing of yourself - of your special knowledge, perspective, and wisdom -- gratifies your soul and also directly benefits your business and your career.  The return on investment (yes, that dreaded measure!) is clear.  Give of yourself generously to the world, and you will earn financial and emotional success in return.

As you develop your community through generous giving of yourself and to others, you build a tremendously powerful network of like-minded partners and supporters in this world - people who find what you have to offer extremely valuable and will share that knowledge with others. These supporters will help you grow your business endeavors by connecting you with new and wonderful folks who will gladly utilize (and pay for) your products, services and special talents, for the greater good of all involved.

Don't trust me?  Take my challenge:

Kathy's challenge:  For three months, participate more fully (in specific, concrete ways) in the social media movement.  Create a blog, share a newsletter, complete your LinkedIn profile, ask for recommendations on LinkedIn and give others a great recommendation, tweet about others' fantastically interesting viewpoints - share freely and openly your wisdom and perspective. (Here are mine, for some samples: blog, newsletter, LinkedIn profile, Twitter). 

Then measure what you get in return.  If you don't see a return that blows your mind, let me know.  I'll send you a free copy of my book Breakdown Breakthrough if you take my challenge.  Write to Kathy@elliacommunications.com to participate and for details.

"See" you soon!

In the past several years, I've coached a good number of other coaches, consultants, healing and wellness practitioners, and small business owners ways to build their community, develop a powerful speaking platform, get their books published and read, and launch successful programs.

I believe that as coaches, private practitioners, and small business owners, many of us were not fully equipped or prepared when we launched our businesses to do what it takes to build them profitably and successfully; instead, we had a "build it and they will come" mentality that didn't generate results because it wasn't aligned with powerful business-building strategies.

One key step that helps you build your community, attract great customers, and expand your marketing reach is to develop and deliver impactful seminars and workshops in your professional niche that educate and enliven your community, customers, and clients.

If you're interested in developing seminars and workshops that really work - and sell - below are six key steps to launching them successfully.  These are essential actions that I've learned -- the hard way -- through my own years of development as a national women's work-life expert and speaker:

1)       Identify the specific area(s) to focus on in creating your seminars

2)       Determine which programs you truly want to offer, versus those you think you "should"

3)      Build your community and audience through partnership, affiliation, and relationship

4)      Price your seminars so that you achieve a targeted audience and make money (and when to offer programs free)

5)      Title your seminars so they stand out and grab the customer

6)      Brand yourself and your business so that you are differentiated from the competition, and able to name and claim your "sweet spot" 

The key is to understand what truly holds you back from delivering successful programs and services, and move forward to overcoming these obstacles.

Entrepreneurs need straight talk and practical help to build your businesses successfully.  The Make Mine a Million Dollar Business programs and community give you just that - real, hands-on support to develop, and implement, effective strategies that work for you and your company.  Thanks M3! 

To support the cause, I'm launching a new teleseminar program created specifically for coaches, consultants, small business owners and private practitioners, called Developing Powerful Seminars that Work - and Sell.  Hope you'll check it out.

Don't wait until it's too late to get the help and support you need.  Reach out today - to M3, a powerful business mentor or consultant, a business-building community or entrepreneurial network of your choice.  It's just an email, phone call or meeting away.  It's in your "vortex" to be wildly successful (as Abraham-Hicks says), and it's up to you to claim it!

Wishing you many happy breakthroughs,
Kathy

Last night in my workshop Live Your True Spirit in CT, our wonderful women's group explored all the ways we suffer and hurt when we take personally things that happen in our lives.  From feeling dejected when we don't win a job, to experiencing the discomfort of disconnection from the individual we're with, to not being liked, or being rebuffed for something we do...we agonize over the feeling that "I blew it," or "I'm not good enough," or "There's a good reason this person doesn't like me," or "she's wrong and I'm right!"

In the amazingly powerful little wisdom book, The Four Agreements, author Don Miguel Ruiz explores four life-changing agreements to make and live by for ultimate personal freedom, including the Second Agreement - "Don't Take Anything Personally."  Ruiz has a treasure trove of transformational wisdom to share; in fact, I cannot count how many people have told me that this little book changed their lives (count me among them).

About taking things personally, Ruiz explains the following:

"When you take things personally, then you feel offended, and your reaction is to defend your beliefs and create conflicts.  You make something big out of something so little, because you have the need to be right and make everybody else wrong   You also try hard to be right by giving them your own opinions.  In the same way, whatever you feel and do is just a projection of your own personal dream, a reflection of your own agreements.  What you say, what you do, and the opinions you have are according to the agreements you have made - and these opinions have nothing to do with me (page 50).

He also shares his concept of the war that goes on in each of our minds, as our minds are full of conflicting voices and personalities, with different agreements that do not necessarily support each other. 

Ruiz shares his belief that, "Wherever you go, you will find people lying to you, and as your awareness grows, you will notice that you also lie to yourself.  Do not expect people to tell you the truth because they also lie to themselves.  You have to trust yourself and choose to believe or not to believe what someone says to you."

I know in my heart Ruiz's wisdom is right-on - the challenge is in living this truth, living this agreement each and every day, every minute.  Our egos hate it - my small self wants everyone else to be wrong, and me to be right!  But I'm truly tired of that way of living (I'm having one of my "allergic reactions" again!")

I'm so thankful to my workshop attendees for reminding me of this agreement (and this little book of Four).  Thanks, ladies!

Perhaps you're ready to stop taking things personally?  You'll feel so free and strong when you do.  I think it's time to make some new agreements, yes?

What should you do if you've been harshly demeaned or criticized for your thoughts and views?

Here are five tips that have helped me tremendously as an author, speaker, and women's advocate, to weather the storm of criticism, and come out on the other side feeling whole and confident:

1)       Remember, what people say is more about them than you

I learned in my therapy training that what comes out of someone's mouth is more about them than you.  Much more.  Their views and words represent (and project) their years of cultural training, experience, upbringing, traumas, lessons, and biases (as well as their insights and wisdom based on their unique filter and history).  So remember that each individual has a custom-tailored view of life that may or may not fit your own.  It doesn't have to.

2)       People who attack you are coming from a deeply fearful place

When someone attacks you verbally, they are coming from a deeply insecure and frightened place.  They've been rocked by what you've said and done, and feel they need to put you down.  Take a look at what you've said (and how you've said it) that may have instigated a defensive stance from someone else.  But remember that you don't have to own how they respond to you.

3)       When someone wants to make you wrong for your beliefs, they often feel threatened by your out-of-the box thinking

I've noticed that when I present thinking that is different from the status-quo, it can lead to a harsh challenge.  Presenting views that ask others to question how things have been done for years, or shed light on trends or behaviors that need to be critically examined and revised, can ruffle people's feathers.  They feel threatened that you want to expose something they'd prefer to remain hidden.  So be it.  But don't let that stop you.

4)       Narcissists in our world abound

Narcissism is rampant in our society (those of you who live and work with one know what I mean!).  A narcissistic individual can't tolerate being challenged, and needs to make you wrong if you disagree with them.  They'll go to tremendous lengths to "prove" they are right (and superior).  If you have a narcissist in your life or work, you feel you can't express yourself without being punished.  Pay attention to those who harshly criticize you for your different views - if they have narcissistic tendencies, realize that you can't win with them.  Don't engage, as it will prove only a lose/lose endeavor.  Just protect (and extract) yourself best you can from their harmful way of thinking and behaving.

5)       Finally, use it as a growth opportunity 

Stand up for what you believe in.  When others don't agree with you, don't doubt yourself and make yourself wrong.  Get connected to what you truly believe in, strengthen your boundaries, learn to deal effectively with rebukes, and remain steady in who you are and what you believe. 

But at the same time, use this criticism for your own learning and growth.  If your words have been hurtful and diminishing to others, perhaps it's time to look at what may be longing to be healed or addressed inside of you.  Reconnect to compassion, understanding, and inclusion in your thoughts and words (and in your relationship with yourself and others).  Our world needs much less judgment, criticism, and pain, and much more love, strength, compassion, inclusiveness, and respect.

After spending eight years reinventing myself from a corporate VP to an entrepreneur, women's career and life coach, author, speaker and women's work-life expert, I've made a good number of huge mistakes and missteps that have tripped me up, and at times, caused me to hang my head in my hands in despair.  I don't believe in regret, and I do think that each and every one of these lessons has made me stronger, more expansive, more connected to who I really am, and ultimately more confident in my abilities to direct my life with satisfaction and joy.

Here are what I've learned are the top five mistakes to avoid when in career transition and embarking on professional reinvention.  I've lived through these mistakes myself, and am stronger for it...but you don't have to!

Mistake #1:

Don't have a "build it and they will come" mentality without utilizing powerful financial, professional, and business-building tactics and strategies

Don't make the mistake of confusing wishful thinking with powerful strategies for moving forward.  Certainly, faith and optimism are essential, but so are sound business and professional goals, plans and tactics, developed with deep know-how and expertise (your own or a great consulting partner), fueled by conscious intention and fierce commitment.

Mistake #2:

Don't underestimate how long it will take you to build a successful new career

Leave your ego at the door when you're evaluating how long full reinvention will take.  Get advice from true experts in the field on the amount of time it will take to launch your new career, and make it very successful.  It's been said that becoming an expert in a field takes 10 years (I believe that's true), and creating a self-sustaining small consulting practice often takes at least five years.

Mistake #3:

Don't neglect having a Plan B, and moving to it when it's time

In my book Breakdown, Breakthrough, I talk about what it takes to reinvent yourself.  Often it requires that you simply refuse to let in (mentally, emotionally, or spiritually) the possibility that you will fail (see Chapter 11 about the amazing comedian Monique Marvez's journey to hell and back).  If you want something badly enough, most likely you'll find a way to get it.  However, if you have a family to support, and other critical financial and other obligations that you feel you must fulfill in life, then you need a Plan B that will get you through the tough financial times.  Use Plan B to help you stay afloat while all along moving forward to your career dreams.

Mistake #4

Don't wait too long to correct your course when you misstep or discover steps on your new path that are wrong for you

Set milestones ("I will achieve this by this date," etc.), and review your progess frequently.   If you're way off course, you need to course-correct.  Also, if where you're going ends up feeling wrong, don't keep going in the same direction.  Don't make yourself "wrong" for how you feel.   Realize a change is necessary, and power up to make that change.

Mistake #5

Don't forget: A fantastic life takes fantastic risks

There's an enormous difference between a "job" and a "calling."  Neither is better or worse - it simply depends on what you want for your life, based on your values and priorities.  If it's a calling you wish to follow, know now that it will require everything you've got to give, and then some.  Please don't expect a fantastic life without understanding that you must risk a great deal to live your life on the cutting edge of experience.

Other lessons I've learned through my eight-year reinvention:

1. There will be times (many, in fact) that you have no idea what to do, and despite all your efforts, you fail at the task at hand
2. If you don't remain "teachable" at all times, you'll suffer
3. If you think you're immune (to anything - the economy, challenges in the workplace, problems in building your business to a satisfactory level) you're wrong
4. When you lose your compassion for others who are challenged in their reinvention or in their efforts to launch themselves successfully, you'll suddenly experience something that brings you back to humility
5. You'll need faith, patience, and perseverance in greater supply than you ever thought possible
6. It's not all up to you
7. Reaching out for help is essential when you're not where you want to be
8. Being part of a like-minded community that offers support, guidance, and encouragement is a blessing and a good business strategy
9. Career reinventing is a life-long process (not a one-time deal), and once you embark on it, it changes you forever.  It's a process that leads you to feel so appreciative of all that you are - flaws, gifts, strengths, blindspots and all - and so excited for each new day that brings you closer to yourself.
10. Reinvention is not for the faint of heart, but oh my...if you're up for it, what gifts it brings.

Wishing you many a very happy reinvention!